Making lemonade

After a pretty good weekend, where I felt okay with where we are, accepting of the impending miscarriage, and eager to try again, this week has been hard. Usually school is a good distraction, but I feel sluggish and tired. I'm sure part of it is normal end-of-semester exhaustion, but I also know that it's harder and harder to act like everything's normal.

But I'm determined to ensure that something good comes out of this ordeal. The state this week enacted very strict abortion laws, over the governor's vetoes. One of the laws requires women to have ultrasounds and listen to detailed descriptions of the fetus prior to having an abortion. Although emotionally painful, this may not sound particularly invasive until you realize that a first-trimester ultrasound is done internally, with a large wand. I have these done regularly to check for follicle development (and more recently, to check on the fetus). And fortunately, I have never had much discomfort. But many women find these ultrasounds to be painful and even violating. The basis of the governor's veto of the law is that there is no exception for victims of rape or incest. I just can't imagine a woman who has already been sexually assaulted being forced to have an internal ultrasound. I don't expect to change anyone's mind about abortion, but I wish my fellow citizens knew what this law actually requires. So a local politician friend of mine is accompanying us to our appointment tomorrow to videotape various aspects of the procedure (preserving as much privacy and dignity as possible, of course). She had expressed a desire on Facebook to make a video about the law, and I just happened to have this appointment already scheduled. I emailed my awesome doctor yesterday to make sure this plan was okay, and he's totally on board. I don't yet know how the video will turn out; but if I can use this experience to educate people, then I will feel like I made the best of a bad situation.

I'm turning comment moderation on. I have had an influx of readers from yesterday's posting; and I assume most of them are conservative Christians who will object to this project. If I get unpleasant responses, you don't need to read them!