Love

I remember hating Valentine's Day for years and years and years. The last good one was probably 1997, the day I got in to Harvard Law School. Of course, my boyfriend at the time was sitting shiva for his grandmother, so there was no celebration. But it was still a happy day. As my 20s ticked by, though, Valentine's Day was often spent alone. And of course, there were some not-so-good V-Days even before 1997. Don't even get me started on 1992.

But this year, I am positively giddy. What a contrast to my blue Christmas. Last Chance really hit the nail on the head:

There will be no adorable kids in costumes at my door begging for candy, there will be no cuties on Santa's knee, or folks with hands joined around the table counting family blessings, there will be no toddler's toddling through fields of spring flowers looking for Easter Eggs, there will be no days devoted entirely to Mothers and Fathers....today there will be me and DH and our love.

I am trying to remember that today is not full of roses for everyone. B and I did the facebook meme where we posted pics of us together and recounted how long we'd been together (married two years, eight months, four wonderful days today). I am filled with love and joy today. But there are still single friends out there lonely today, and I read some wonderful widowed bloggers for whom V-Day and the FB meme is like a shot through the heart.

I am so thankful today. B and I have been through some rough spots the last two years -- the job market, the move, the miscarriage, the seemingly never-ending treatments. And yet we're happier today than we were two years, eight months, four days ago. In fact, we are happier each day than we were the last. We are coming through this stronger. I am a lucky girl.

We loved this week's V-Day episode of "Grey's Anatomy." One of the patients -- always so full of life wisdom -- revealed to Meredith our own philosophy: ''Fifteen years ago, I made a choice, and I keep making it every day. That's what marriage is.''

And today I choose to be happy. I hope you do too. Thanks for reading. I love you.

Quick IVF update: I've been through 10 days of Loopyron. My mood is fantastic; I have not threatened to kill the husband, the dog, the students, or anyone else. The headache has been with me since Wednesday. It's somewhat reassuring: hopefully it means the drug is working. Doctor's appointment this coming Wednesday to make sure all is quiet on the reproductive front.