10 weeks, 1 day: Taking the (final) plunge

Last night was momentous: the last injection of the cycle! After several weeks of little needles to grow follicles, the disastrous trigger shot, and eight weeks of progesterone shots (1 1/2 inch needles injecting medication suspended in thick oil), we are finished! At 10 weeks, the placenta is supporting itself and doesn't need any additional support. I am looking forward to recovering from the bruising, welts, and lumps.

I also took the plunge and bought some elastic waist Old Navy maternity pants. I haven't gained any weight. (In fact, this week, I may have lost some -- I haven't checked.) But I'm uncomfortable enough that the idea of real pants, especially jeans, makes me cringe. And I'm running out of knit skirts! This purchase makes things seem very real.

9 weeks, 6 days: Update

Everything looks fine, thank goodness! Baby is measuring on track, with a giant head (gets that from both mom and dad). We were able to see arms and legs and lots of wiggling around. I still feel pretty terrible, both headache and nausea/vomiting. But the doctor thinks the headache is primarily the result of anxiety, not the pregnancy. (You called it Niamh!) I am hopeful if the headache resolves, I will go back to my usual carsickness. I've got some painkillers that take the edge off for a while, but I can't take any real migraine meds. So mostly I have to wait this out and hope that the painkillers don't cause rebound headaches.

9 weeks, 6 days: Heading to the doctor

I was up most of the night with a migraine and vomiting. The migraine worries me, since it's a new and very different "symptom." The nurse called in some painkillers for me this morning, so I was finally able to get some rest. But we're heading in for an appointment this afternoon to check on the pregnancy. My migraines tend to be triggered by hormonal changes. Scared.

9 weeks, 4 days: Trying to take it one day at a time

The yuckiness has been significantly better since Friday. On the one hand, I'm relieved; on the other hand, I'm terrified. My midwife appointment next Wednesday seems so far away without the reassurance of the yucks. Of course, it doesn't help that I broke down and bought some new, ummmm, more supportive undergarments and a couple of pregnancy/baby books. Now I am convinced I have tempted the Fates too much.

8 weeks, 5 days: Graduation Day!

Everything looks great -- baby is strong and healthy, measuring a few days ahead (nothing wrong with being bigger than average at this stage) with a heartbeat of 181. A normal fetal heart rate ranges from 120 to 200, with higher better. So the kid is excelling already! We graduated from Dr. Reshef; and my next appointment, in two weeks, will be with the midwives at the University. I'm really excited to have this option. They deliver at the hospital as part of the regular OB-GYN service, so they offer a nutty and crunchy birth experience with all the medical back up one could need. Labor & Delivery is also connected to the Children's Hospital and NICU, so I feel very safe.

Last night was the worst yet for the nausea. I think this is the first time in my life I've actually liked mornings! I'm even glad to be teaching in the mornings; I might make it through classes this semester. I'm not prepped for tomorrow's classes yet, though, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a reprieve tonight.

Any suggestions for getting a sweet, overprotective husband and father-to-be to stop worrying?

Now we settle in for the wait. I'm sure I'll check in occasionally as the pregnancy progresses to update you. And I'm sure I'll have some ongoing thoughts on infertility, the pain of which, I can tell already, will never go away. But tonight, we're celebrating! (With ginger ale.) Today's picture is below, still looking more kidney bean than human. The bigger end is the head, and you can see the faint outlines of the umbilical cord.

8 weeks, 4 days: Carsick

Ah, the irony! I said to both Brent and my mom this weekend, "We spent two and a half years and how many thousands of dollars so I could feel this bad?" After a week of this, the next four or weeks seems like it will stretch out interminably. Mornings are okay, if marked by ravenous hunger. Afternoons are lousy, though, with a constant feeling of carsickness. Naps don't seem to help; I wake up still feeling yucky.

The good news is that if you'd asked me yesterday, I would have told you I had no doubts we were going to get good news at tomorrow's appointment. Now, with the appointment less than 24 hours away, I'm definitely feeling anxious again. But the yuckiness is reassuring enough that I'm not completely panicked!

7 weeks, 5 days: Afternoon sickness?

I am beginning to think this might be the real thing.

Exhibit A: afternoon fatigue, shakiness, general yuckiness several days in a row;
Exhibit B: ravenous hunger followed by feeling full after just a few bites;
Exhibit C: the garlic I put in tonight's dinner made me gag!

It's all pretty minor, for which I am thankful. But I am also thankful for some reassurance. We are trying our best not to be consumed by anxiety. It all feels rather schizophrenic. Sometimes everything is fine and we are talking baby names and cloth v. disposable diapers. And then the pendulum swings and we are convinced that this isn't going to happen for us. It's exhausting!

One more week to go!